its 3:29 and I am so bored. I need the weekend to myself. Actually, I need to go out and hang loose. I am dying. But Saturday will be busy with the kenduri stuff and Sunday is just crap that I of all people have to stay home and babysit. I'm feeling kind of lonely right now, but i do not want company. I want to drown my sorrow alone. I want to cry. Like what the hell is wrong with me.
I think I am depressed. Its no biggie. I think maybe it's due to the monthly cycle. But what the hell, I hate feeling so low about myself. I don't even feel comfortable being myself. All I feel like doing is to drop down and cry. All I can manage and have energy now is to pretend that I am alright. I feel something inside me trying to break loose. Its horrible, i do not even have control over my feelings and emotions. I am a wreck. I do not feel good. Its physically and mentally draining.
Why is the world suddenly so empty and quiet? Am I dying?
